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If you find yourself reading this article, you are clearly interested in more than just vanilla sex. There’s nothing wrong with being vanilla, but there’s also nothing wrong with adding some extra kink.

Bringing some BDSM sex toys into your life might be normal for you and your partner. Maybe even expected. But if you have not yet experienced the thrill of a flogger, you have not yet lived to your full sexual potential.

Although some of you would be familiar with floggers through films like Fifty Shades of Grey, holding one in your hand or being on the receiving end is bigger and better than anything on screen.

What is a flogger?

A flogger is an accessory that can produce pleasurable stings. It consists of strands of leather (sometimes other material) called tails, which are attached to a handle, or hilt. The handle is also sometimes wrapped in leather for easier gripping.

There are various types of floggers and they are versatile in how you use them and the effect you would like it to give. Some even come with dildos at the base for extra stimulation.

Floggers can be used by Dominants to train or punish their subs. Depending on how much force you place in your strokes, you could either give your sub a gentle tease or temporary marks on their skin.

Flogging your sub or partner doesn’t have to be rough. You could use the tails to tease and tickle your partner also, tempting them until climax.

Who should use a flogger?

Floggers are vital accessories for those interested in BDSM. It gives Dominants an effective tool to train and punish their subs.

A flogger could also be used by a couple that wants to explore their kinkier side and perhaps even discover which one of them is submissive. It is highly satisfying and brings out the sexually hungrier side of your personality.

For beginners, you should start slow and work your way up to experiencing harder and harder discipline. It’s important not to go too far too fast because you might end up harming your partner.

Also talk to your partner about his/her experience with flogging to decide what you are both comfortable with, and what you both want and how.

How to use a flogger?

It’s best to start any scene with a warmup to help prepare and introduce your mind and body to the pleasurable pain that will come. 

For beginners, always start by giving your partner a few gentle strokes, and take your time. The more thorough the warm-up, the more prepared you and your partner will be. When it comes to good flogging, it’s all about accuracy. And remember to create a safe word. Specifically, one that is not likely to come up during pleasure.

For safety, especially for the novices, stay away from striking your partner’s knees, elbows, spine or kidney area. This is very important. The best area to flog is your partner’s butt, because of all the meat acting as a cushion.

Tips on using a flogger

For newbies or just to get better, practice on a pillow or covering an area on your partner with a towel to practice your aim and accuracy. This will not only improve your skills but also improve the experience of your partner receiving the flogging.

Flog lightly on the following areas: Thighs, butt, back (but not the spine or kidney areas), breasts, genitals, arms, and uppers shoulders.

Areas to avoid at all times: never flog the face, head, neck, the fingers, toes, or over skin that is still healing. Please keep in mind, your feet and hands contain many tiny and fragile bones, and rarely heal well once broken.

Don’t forget aftercare 

Remember to take care of your partner, addressing any physical pains or marks they received during flogging sessions. Good aftercare includes a soft and caring rubdown/massaging of the arms, legs, and butt with lotion.